REAL Real Stories of the Highway Patrol

All right, so I came back to Chicago from St. Louis early Thursday morning because I finished all my business there and I had to get down to business here. Anyway, since I decided to drive my car down there so I could get around during the week, I naturally had to drive it back. I take I-55 because it's the most direct way to go. I could take I-70 to I-57 through Champaign/Urbana and into the underbelly of the south side of Chicago, but I don't want to know how much longer that would take, so I've never attempted it. The trip is already 5 hours long. Come to think of it, if I did that, I could probably bypass alot of that downtown traffic at 90/94 and I-55.... hmmm.... we'll see about that one.

Moving on to my point. So when I drive that route, I usually see a plethora of law enforcement. Usually it's highway patrol in their white cars with the gold stripe, but I have seen SUVs, black cars, and even American muscle cars either unmarked or with insignia. Most of the time they are in the center grass or gravel turnarounds, but I have seen them on the shoulder, on overpasses, and even on on-ramps. Sometimes I will drive the whole time and not see one. Sometimes I will see a few, but only after they already have another driver pulled over. This last trip home, I saw about 9 on the way back. Here's the thing - given my experience in driving this route from visiting Kristen's family all those years, I knew I should probably invest in a radar detector... so I did (actually, I had my mom get it for me for Christmas because I never know what to request when prompted - usually around Thanksgiving). She got a really nice model - a Cobra. I guess it's nice... they have a reputation of being effective in preventing traffic violations and it looked expensive. I have been using it ever since and it has saved my ass a few times. So this last trip, you could imagine that after seeing 9 of these guys I would have been tired of the detector chirping... right? Wrong! It only went off three times... 3-out-of-9!! I had to roll up on the rest of them doing about 80, having an "oh shit" moment, and then lightly applying the brakes to make it appear that I wasn't speeding, only to pass them at about 70+ with no repercussions to serve.

It's actually almost frustrating. Don't get me wrong, I don't want a ticket, but if I'm going to use a radar detector (which I am not even sure is legal in IL), I want it to detect radar and justify its existence on my windshield. I'm not so sure, but I am not convinced that these guys are even shooting radar sometimes. In fact, I don't think they are, meaning that only 33% (by my data collection) of state troopers on I-55 shoot their radars (this isn't my first time noticing this trend either). Think about it, the detector works sometimes, and I'm sure with its sophisticated technology and Cobra's unblemished reputation that it's not a piece of crap that only works 33% of the time.

Here's my theory: I think the cops (67% of them, anyway) don't really want to write anyone a citation, they just want to slow them down for a few miles. I have also had this theory when I see one of them driving in the traffic lane. They will drive for miles and miles, seemingly without purpose (where do they have to go?). The cars around them will take a very long time to slowly attempt to pass them at about 1 to 5 miles per hour above the speed limit. Successful as these speeders may be, the cop has still disrupted the "flow" of a vast majority of lead footers on the road for several miles at a time - more efficient than pulling them over. I actually give them kudos if this is what they are really trying to do... I find it to be very effective.

Kind of sticking with the topic - do you guys remember that TV show, "Real Stories of the Highway Patrol"? basically it was a show about cop stories from the California Highway Patrol (or CHiPs... hehe, remember that show?). They would re-enact these outlandish incidents that happened to real troopers on the job. It was kinda cool - I watched it as a kid.